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December 15, 2018

Will flatulence destroy Brett Kavanaugh?

September 30, 2018
Judge Brett Kavanaugh testifies to the Senate Judiciary Committee during his Supreme Court confirmation hearing in the Dirksen Senate Office Building on Capitol Hill on September 27, 2018 in Washington, DC. (Win McNamee / Getty Images)

Can a Supreme Court judge be impeached for lying under oath about farting?




That’s what could happen to Brett Kavanaugh should he be confirmed, making him the first Supreme Court judge indicted for lying under oath about flatulence, not to mention passing out dead drunk, threesomes and the other disgusting things enjoyed by white boys of privilege of a certain age.

He seemingly lied under oath about all of them. This is, of course, in addition to the five more serious possible lies to Congress in previous years about stolen documents, torture, and warrantless wiretapping, among others, according to Mother Jones.

The sexual assault allegations by Dr. Christine Blasey Ford may never be proved, but it’s easy to prove that he’s such a pathological liar that he even bald-face lied to the Senate Judiciary Committee about what he himself wrote in his Georgetown Prep yearbook.

He said his reference to “Devil’s Triangle” was merely the name of a drinking game. Yeah, it is, but Urban Dictionary defines it as “a drinking game where you get a girl too drunk to consent (and hopefully to resist) to having sex with you and a buddy at the same time.” Weirder still? The term “Devil’s Triangle” on Wikipedia was changed to “drinking game” within hours of Kavanaugh’s testimony. Who changed it? Who knows?

What about the “FFFFFFourth of July” entry, which attorney Michael Avenetti said it was prep speak for “Find them, French them, Feel them, Finger them, F*ck them, Forget them”? Kavanaugh said it was about a friend who “wound up” his F’s before using the F-word. Right. I was told by a friend of the Kennedy cousins that the preppy boys in those elite circles used a similar phrase back in the ’70s and ’80s.

Choirboy, my butt.

What about “boofed”? Kavanaugh said it meant flatulence. The New Yorker wrote, however, that it “refers to the practice of anally ingesting alcohol or drugs.” No wonder he has a weak stomach!

Thing is? Lying under oath is not a joke, it’s a crime punishable by up to five years in jail. Perjury not only disqualifies him for the Supreme Court but, should he be confirmed, could lead to his prosecution and impeachment.

Right, sure, who’s going to bring those charges? We can. Regular outraged citizens, that’s who.

Civil rights powerhouse, Norman Siegel confirmed that citizens, as well as a Senator or House member, could make a complaint to the U.S. Attorney or the FBI that Kavanaugh lied under oath.

“Another possibility,” Siegel said, “is that the local Maryland District Attorney/Prosecutor could open a criminal investigation into Dr. Ford’s allegations. My understanding is that there is no statute of limitations in Maryland for sexual assault. That could also get at the truth.”

Attorney Andrew Celli said, “Judge Kavanaugh’s testimony — denying the sexual assault of Dr. Christine Blasey Ford, denying episodes of ‘blackout’ drinking, even denying the meaning of various puerile comments in his high school yearbook — could serve as a basis for a perjury prosecution. You’d need three things: evidence of falsity; evidence of Judge Kavanaugh’s intent to lie — which can be presumed under these circumstances; and a prosecutor with courage. A woman prosecutor would be best of all.”

In other words, it ain’t over ’til the fat liar sings.




Are FFFFFF-ing Lunatics Running the Asylum?

President Trump on Friday ordered an FBI background check into his Supreme Court pick Brett “FFFFFF” Kavanaugh. This came after Sen. Jeff Flake asked for a one-week investigation into the sexual assault allegation by Dr. Ford. Well, he asked for it and got it after Flake was verbally accosted by victims of sexual assault who screamed their pain at him as he was standing inside an elevator looking like he’d rather be drinking Drano.

U.S. Sen. Jeff Flake (R-AZ) speaks to members of the media after a meeting in the office of Senate Majority Leader Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-KY) September 28, 2018.
U.S. Sen. Jeff Flake (R-AZ) speaks to members of the media after a meeting in the office of Senate Majority Leader Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-KY) September 28, 2018. (Alex Wong / Getty Images)

Trump, obviously realizing that the impossible had, in fact, happened because his guy hit a bump in his smooth road to run roughshod over the American people, issued a statement saying, “I’ve ordered the FBI to conduct a supplemental investigation to update Judge Kavanaugh’s file. As the Senate has requested, this update must be limited in scope and completed in less than one week.”

So here’s the question: Who is going to issue an order for an investigation into Trump’s life? He’s the one with at least a dozen sexual misconduct allegations against him—and he’s the one who lied about it as late as last week. In his unhinged press conference, he said, “I was accused by four or five women who got paid a lot of money to make up stories about me. We caught them and the mainstream media refused to put it on television. They refused to even write about it…”

Nothing in that entire statement is true, by the way. There were at least 13 women; there’s no evidence anyone was paid anything. He mistakenly forgot he was talking about himself since he’s the one whose lawyer paid women for their silence and whose bestie, AMI Chairman and CEO David Pecker killed the stories in the National Enquirer.

Dr. Huxtable and Mr. Hyde

What with the Supreme Court nominee being outed in front of the world as an alleged vicious, dangerous sexual predator, we nearly forgot that the convicted vicious, dangerous sexual predator, Bill Cosby, a star who freely hunted dozens and dozens of women for decades, is now Inmate NN7687.

Cosby got slammed with a sentence in the slammer for three to 10 years by Judge Steven T. O’Neill, five months after being convicted on three counts of aggravated indecent assault against Andrea Constand.

EAGLEVILLE, PA - SEPTEMBER 25: In this handout image provided by the Montgomery County Correctional Facility, Bill Cosby poses for a mugshot on September 25, 2018 in Eagleville, Pennsylvania. Cosby was sentenced to three-to 10-years for sexual assault.
EAGLEVILLE, PA – SEPTEMBER 25: In this handout image provided by the Montgomery County Correctional Facility, Bill Cosby poses for a mugshot on September 25, 2018 in Eagleville, Pennsylvania. Cosby was sentenced to three-to 10-years for sexual assault. (Montgomery County Correctional Facility / Getty Images)

America’s Dad, a lousy phony who preached about family and decency, turned out to be the most indecent man outside of Washington. He should have run for office, he would have fit right in.

Seeing the guy we all loved being led away in cuffs was a shocker all the same. He was so good at playing the good guy that we could never have imagined that Dr. Huxtable was really Mr. Hyde.

Time To Woman Up!

Just when things were looking so bad, so discouraging, so outrageous, it took a couple of young women—one from Queens— to slay the kings of sleaze in the Senate. Speak loudly and carry a big stick.

Outerborough activist Ana Maria Archila, who screamed in anguish at Sen. Jeff Flake about her sex assault, screamed for all women, and she was heard. In fact, the whole world heard both her and co-activist Maria Gallagher. Together they forced Flake to force the Senate to delay the sure-thing vote on tainted Brett Kavanaugh.

Forget that phony year of the woman, which does nothing for women—this was the week of the woman. Three of the bravest women in the country, Gallagher, Archila, and Blasey Ford have just changed the D.C. paradigm. Watch out, boys—the women are coming for you. No, not for your bodies — for your seats.




Pol reveals secret hidden for 70 years

A day after the testimony by Dr. Ford, octogenarian New Jersey Senate Majority Leader Loretta Weinberg posted a Facebook shocker: “OK here goes. I am 83 years old and I still remember the EXACT moment and EXACTLY where I was at age 13 when I was first horribly groped and forcibly kissed by a middle-aged man who had been (a) welcome visitor in my home. And no I never told anyone till now. His name was Ben Laverty. And no I am not confused. And yes that was a long time ago.”

No, it wasn’t to discredit Ford — it was to explain how victims never forget—even though it sometimes takes 70 years to talk about it.




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