Salad frosting is the new Santa Claus.
Sometime between the time a child learns there’s no Tooth Fairy and the time he or she acquiesces to eating greens with no prodding, comes the vegetable version of cupcakes.
Easter Bunny, meet … salad frosting.
Kraft has relabeled its ranch dressing with a name that evokes images of glazed donuts.
To get sweet-toothed kids to eat vegetables, the food conglomerate has repackaged ranch dressing in a frosting tube that allows for drizzling, in an ostensible assist for harried parents.
To market this crafty innovation, the company is goading moms and dads to up their lying game and add a new one to their arsenal. And that’s no lie.
“It’s just Kraft ranch dressing (and deception),” says the straightforward-looking mom in the promo video, detailing the ingredients.
“Innocent lies parents tell their kids help alleviate the pressures of everyday parenting, and if it gets kids to eat their greens, so be it,” said Kraft marketing head Sergio Eleuterio in a statement. “Simple innocent lies are not only part of parenthood, but a true tactic used by parents everywhere. Kraft Salad ‘Frosting’ is one lie you won’t feel bad telling your kids.”
The inevitable slew of tweets that erupted in the wake of this disclosure ranged from “marketing genius right here” to “this world is a hellscape,” and posts to the effect of, “I don’t want to teach my kids to lie, thanks,” as Elite Daily reported.
Others pointed out that it simply wouldn’t work, with statements like, “they are smarter than you think and way smarter than Kraft.”
The whole thing might not be much of a lie anyway, as Huffington Post pointed out in comparing it to Pillsbury Creamy Supreme vanilla frosting.
The actual frosting is not that different in calorie and fat content, since the icing contains 140 calories and five fat grams per two-tablespoon serving, while the dressing boasts 110 calories and 11 grams of fat.